Monday, January 18, 2010

Random Story #6




A FANTASY

It was around 11 at night, he was marching across his room in a constant to and fro motion, his hands were sweaty, his mouth dry, he felt an intense knot growing in his stomach, he was much less nervous during the presentation he conducted earlier this morning and managed to make a huge sale for his company. He was happy and wanted to celebrate but he was in a foreign land, and was alone on the trip. He had bought a bottle of red wine, he was not exactly an expert on wines, so he went for the ‘if it’s expensive it must be good’ rule. Back in his room he eagerly took out the bottle and found a pamphlet attached to it. He took it out to find pictures of semi naked Caucasian women all over it, the heading said ‘HOT BABES TO SATISFY ALL YOUR DESIRES', a few phone numbers were scribbled at the bottom, the pictures did the rest of the talking. Initially he was amused but as they an empty mind is a devils workshop, he began wondering. He was a 38 year old, married for about 15 years with two kids, but for the past few years sex has been a rarity. On the few occasions when it actually did happen it was nothing more than a set of routine steps which he had mastered over the years, initially he did try to spice things up by suggesting new things but his wife was not open to experimentation, soon even he lost interest and the act of pleasure had all the pleasure sucked out of it.
Some nights he felt very frustrated and thought about exploring other option, but during those weak hours it was the fear of ignominy that stopped him from doing something drastic, what if he got caught, he would loose his wife, his kids and above all his reputation and respect he has earned through years of hard work. It was way too risky, too much was on stake but today he had a chance. He was in a foreign land where nobody knew him, all he needed to do was make a phone call and that’s it. He had all his amorous feelings bottled inside of him for years, he was not sure how long he could contain them, after all he was a man and he had his needs but he didn’t want his family to suffer just because he wanted the fulfillment of a few of his desires, now he had an opportunity to get it all out of his system without doing any damage, he couldn’t just let it go. After an hour long mental battle he was finally able to justify it to himself, than he made the toughest phone call of his life, ‘blondes or brunettes’, the man on the other side asked for his preferences, ‘blonde’ he replied, ‘tall or short’ ,the man enquired, ‘tall’ was all that he could mutter, ‘500 dollars cash’, the man said, he instinctively wanted to bargain but his negotiation skills were nowhere to be found and the only word that came to his mind was ‘ok’. So $500 was set, he gave the man the address of the hotel and his room number, ‘Amanda will be there in about an hour’, the man said and the call finally ended and he could start breathing again. Very soon he began to feel  it was all too much for him to handle, he was getting too anxious, he needed alcohol, so after half a bottle of red wine here he was marching through his room. The bell rings, the wait finally ends, ‘Amanda’ was here.
‘Amanda’ was six feet tall, blonde as he had asked for, she had the figure of a goddess and the face of a doll, watching her magnificent form added to his anxiety and the knot in his stomach intensified, he realized he needed to puke, he ran to his bathroom, after ten traumatic minutes he came back to find ‘Amanda’ on the bed, ready for the act with two glasses of wine in her hand. This sight made matter worse for him. His whole body began shaking, he realized he could no longer stand, so he grabbed the table beside him for support, every cell of his body was screaming ‘NO’, apparently a man is not what he fascinates about, he is what he can do and to his surprise he was not the man who was willing to do this, he decided that he will give her the 500 dollars and then tell her to leave but he was completely unable to phrase it, he failed to find any word he was looking for, maybe the wine would help, he grabbed the glass from her and drank the whole thing in one gulp, he quickly made up his mind, took $500 from his closet, went back to her, gave her a smile and then fell to the ground unconscious. When he woke up ‘Amanda’ was gone and so were his belongings.



22 comments:

Chhaya said...

Ahhhh damn...

Poor guy :)

btw, if u dont mind, i wud suggest that you remove the explanation about why he cudnt do it ..

as a reader, i wud love to read between the lines and understand what you explained.

overall, nice.

PS: i really hope u wont mind my unsolicited suggestion :)

Sunil Balani said...

Goodness may torment..... and truly there are many times when hunger and passion wage a war against logic and reason.....who wins the battle is decided by what we call character....nice read....

Oxymoron said...

@chhaya

oh...i am still a toddler when it comes to writing....it will still take a while before i develop an unhealthy ego about it....till then you are safe...and if you look closely you will find it's no longer unsolicited.... :)

coming to the story when i began writing it...he was actually going to go through with it.....but somewhere during the writing i started liking the guy...so the whole explanation was more for me...then for the readers...

ofcourse even i like reading stuff that make me think instead of spoon feeding me everything....a big reason why i dont like mainstream bollywood
movies... ;)

@sunil
hey... welcome to my blog...indeed every tough situation we face in our life is a test of our character...
hope to see you more here..

itsyvitsy said...

I love this story. You have brought out a very strong message - "apparently a man is not what he fascinates about, he is what he can do". So very true. And I could only say that it was fair for him to lose his belongings as he would constantly be reminded of this message next time he thinks macho of himself.

Sorcerer said...

well written dude. Apart from the spices it has a very strong point that your story made.
very nice

my knowledgeable friend used to say

Anonymous said...

Liked the story.
And loved the reply to chhaya.
:~)

 ALH said...

Thanks for the comment on my blog! I really appreciate it.

I read your story and agree with Chhaya. I think with some tight editing this could be a very good story :)

el_idioto said...

I will never cheat with a 6-f00t tall gal call Amanda, again.

well written.. scripted beautifully

nil said...

Hmmm. Intrigued by your writing..

Liked it,actually!
Hmm..still thinking!

Anyway, wher are you on my blog!?
haven't seen u in a while.
updated. waiting for ur feedback!!

keep writing dude! Youre good.

Oxymoron said...

@vittal i kind of feel sorry for the guy...but some lessons need to be learned the hard way...

@sorcerer hey....thanx for the appreciation...

@yemiled i am glad you did...

@ALH let's hope i do a better job next time...

Oxymoron said...

@Rishi thanx dude.....i guess we should all beware of the Amandas of the world.... :)

@nil it's great to hear that my story made you think...thats one of the main reasons why i write...
oh....i am definitely going to more regular at your blog...

mohit said...

naice... a great random post..

I wanted to see what happened without all the alcohol though ;)

next part coming up?

Tavish Chadha(sensible-bakwas.com) said...

man u r awesome... very nicely narrated story... just couldn't get my attention away for even a min...

P.S. I know I was supposed to viit the blog muche before and I couldnt... better late than never!

Cheers!
Tavish - Sensible Bakwas

Karthik said...

It was too good, man. I knew your protagonist didn't have the guts to do it, from the beginning. :P
The ending was apt. The narration was very good.
It was a nice read. :)

Shreya. said...

i know for a fact that Caucasian MEN are real hot...woman i dont know :P

AND...nice one :)
like short simple and sweet...!!!!

Really :)

Vikram Kumar said...

Lol.. The fact that the protagonist couldn't do it almost made me laugh and yes, he desrves the aftermath. And the portrayal of his fear is really good.
Nice one!

Do check out the new story I've posted in my blog.

Cheers.

Ashley said...

Aha! Did not see that coming..But then again...He had it coming...

Very well told..I read this amongst a lot of chaos around me..But I was still engrossed..Just refusing to leave my screen..You are a very good story teller! :)

Oxymoron said...

@mohit welcome to my blog...i am glad you liked it...

@Tavish hey...better late then never...it's good to know it was worth your time...

@karthik i guess he was too nervous from the begining...

@VK hello.....everybody seems to believe the guy deserved it...while i feel bad for the poor fellow....

@Ashley hey....it had been a while since you visited my blog..it's great to know that you found my story engrossing...

The Idiot Blogs said...

OW... OW... OW... OW

He couldn't stand? He couldn't stand??

Poor man... now wonder he fainted...

Jokes apart mate.. well written...

KittySigurdardottir. said...

Shuuu,good night!I wouldn't wanna mess with Amanda.I'd probably be a shark bait to her.Of course I'm a straight woman and would never be her costomer,unless she is bi,but I m not bi either,neither would I buy Amanda if I was bi,it's just that would never wanna mess with her,but I'm not scared of her or am I a tinsy bit like my FORMER girl friend,I'm glad I know she's a sociopath that explains a lot.

Unknown said...

intense story!
u have a talent for writing..but you probably already know that! oh well..i'm glad i stumbled upon this blog, its great :)

susie said...

That was good.. i probably wouldnt have liked it so much had it ended otherwise.. :)