Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Fate and Other Disasters

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It was one of those afternoons when I felt sleepy but was quite unwilling to sleep, so I decided to write something, anything that came to my mind without really trying to make up my mind or give a particular direction to my train of thoughts, writing without thinking, these are literally random thoughts. I liked what I read so I decided to post it.
Sometimes I just wonder how the two decades of my life have  shaped , what strikes me the most here is the fact that how little of it was in my control, how much of it is already decided , fate some might say it but the idea makes me very uncomfortable. It’s a sick idea , shows the characteristic lack of imagination that is plaguing  this modern world of ours , for the sake of arguments let’s  just say there is this all powerful being called GOD who created this infinite universe of ours and for some reason decided to lavish all his attention on to us , the humble inhabitants of the minuscule planet  Earth , why would he create so many  characters give them the wonderful quality of intelligence and then decide every event of their lives , where is the fun in that don’t you think he would rather sit back and watch the plot grow ,he could decide a few things to keep the proceedings  interesting but the entire story is as much of a surprise to him as is it is a suspense to us. What really worries me is the fact that how much of my life is governed by the prejudices of other people living or dead. Even before I was born my parents decided I am not supposed   to have any siblings.
When I grew a bit older nature taught me to go for what I want, so I utilized whatever little resources I had , first I tried using my underdeveloped language skills to communicate with my parents, when that failed I tried squealing , crying, shouting  initially I won but soon I learned I will  not get everything I want , I will have to  choose my battles . I was taught that obedience was a desirable trait and I should strive to attain it , which meant acting upon the wishes of the older members of the family , apparently my natural instincts were wrong, “We know what’s best for you “ I was told ,arguing was what I was not supposed to do, why should I argue, all it’s going to do is make me think, now nobody wants that , why must one think when everything has been decided by GOD all we need to do is abide by his wishes. A few years later I find myself in an institution called school, yet more people telling me what I should do , the books have  some really amazing pictures , I find myself intrigued ,I  am lost in them , I begin making imaginary stories about them but my thoughts are interrupted ,”Concentrate “ the teacher tells me ,why is the writers story more important than mine I ask myself, my interest in the book diminishing. Soon I realize that everything that I am going to study has already been decided and what I thought about it did not matter. Years later I find myself in an engineering college struggling to study what I really want to and in the process being forced to load my brain with all this unnecessary crap which I don’t remember a week after the exam. “Where is all this going?” I often find myself wondering but never seem to find a satisfactory answer no matter how much I contemplate on the subject, this uncertainty excites me the possibilities seem endless but what if there indeed is fate, the idea of future just an illusion and all these possibilities I see the byproduct of my deluded mind, these thoughts make me sick but then again they haven’t found a gene for fate yet so there is still hope and I have decided to cling on to it.
 




16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey!Thats some random thoughts with a lot of sense...
The gene for fate exists or not..I feel fate exists....
Its all fate but then again...fate is all flexible..we can change it the way we want.

MAy be that wat keeps god interested in us..to see how we change de fate according to our likes :)

now that is some random thought of mine...

nil said...

Indeed I agree with the comment above. Random,but very very sensible. It's hard to write and put words that way,you've done a great job :)

I wouldn't comment on Fate yet. Everytime I thought of it,it has resulted in nothing but hours and hours of procrastination.
So maybe someday,I figure what I think, and you'll be the first to know :)

Keep writing.
:)

Chhaya said...

U know buddy, sometimes i feel that the world as we know it is one big reality show. some of it is scripted and some is spontaneous.

i agree with u when u talk about the major decisions of our lives not being in our hands.. but most of us are gonna do the same to our kids when we have them.. if i have a kid then i for sure wont ask her/him if s/he wants a sibling. but i guess we will give our kids more freedome than was given to us. at least when it comes to career and such things.

i like ur randor ponderings...

wish to read more :)

PS: i dont blv in fate. i m a big fan of Quantum theory. fate becomes reality only when u start blvng (observing) in it

Maya said...

the world is just a matrix of realationships, and these seemingly indepedent relationship work in a particular pattern to decide our fate. If u consider it in a time line then certainly ur future is already decided, but since nobody knows about anybodys future, its still undecided, its like a game, the options are limited but u do have choices, the choices that will take u to next level or will end the game, but u have to play within the limitations of the game..

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Somdatta said...

someone said fate + effort= result. so it doesn't matter what ur fate has in store for u...u can always change the value of effort n get a changed result. But there r some decisions in life over which we seriously have no control..n unfortunately parents can decide it the best.

S. said...

at times i ponder over the same issue.. :[

keep writing,will keep visiting :)

itsyvitsy said...

Can relate to it completely. You have capture the woes of every sane man (and woman) alive on the face of this earth. It is quite rare that we have our say, and when we really do there are a lot of undercurrents.

But, times are changing. Children are allowed to choose their fields of interest, choose their partners, choose their profession, and so on. I hope this is the dawn of a new era where disastrous fate does not have a chance to rule the lives of the new generation.

IdleMind said...

I kept smiling at the idea of preconception ... who knows what to be done and when to? To me, the idea is just to live and let live. Don't just exist, and don't exploit others ... remaining is just plain living, and enjoying life.

If you think too much abt past, present or future, the joy of living is somewhat interrupted! isn't it?

Guess even Lord likes it that way! :)

Oxymoron said...

@yemiledu hey..a flexible fate huh...it's like having very co-operative parents...they have a plan for you but with the proper persuasion techniques you can have your own way...

@nil i am glad you liked it...lets see when you make up your mind...

@chhaya true kids today are getting more and more freedom...parents indeed are becoming more understanding...
it's great you like my random ponderings and more importantly have a similar view on the subject...
and...thanx for the advice on your blog...

Oxymoron said...

@US indeed...the choices we make decide to a great extent how our life turns out...and ofcourse their is the 'butterfly effect' which we cannot foresee..

@somdatta interesting equation, effort is all we have in our hands, but sometimes even the best of our efforts are not enough...i guess it comes down to'do your best leave the rest'...

@sunakshi hey...welcome to my blog...we are all fascinated by our future...

Oxymoron said...

@Vittal loved the comment...lets hope that era arrives soon....they might not always make the best decision but they will atleaste be free....and their is nothing like it...

@idle you present a new thought 'live and let live'....wonderful concept...what could be better...but the irony of the human condition is that we find other people's life and problem more interesting....
and of course living in the present is the only way to remain truly happy...

Sorcerer said...

when I hear about this word Fate"
I remember this movie dialogue in Matrix where Neo Replies
"I dont believe in fate because I dont like the idea that i am not in control of my life"

we are good in adapting.so no worries :)

oRange* said...

i came, i read, i loved it.
following you, now!

Oxymoron said...

@sorcerer yeah i love that dialogue too...kinda similar to what i say here...

@oRange hey...welcome to my blog..i am glad you liked it

Unknown said...

very deep thoughts. and i love the title of the post!