Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Random Story #2




HIDDEN INTENTIONS
The room was dimly lit, there were scented candles all around, a pretty romantic environment one might say, the two lovers were lying on the bed both half naked perhaps in the middle of their foreplay, but neither of them moved, maybe they were teasing each other. There was a third person present in the room a woman, in the midst of twenty different aromas there was one that stood apart it was more potent than the others, it came from the gun that the woman had, it was the smell of gun powder.
She stood there looking at the consequence of her action, the man with the bullet in his chest was her husband the girl beside him had been a regular recipient of his affection for the past one year or so, a bullet landed on her head. She had known about her husband's spread of affection for the past couple of months she was waiting to catch him in the act, today she finally got the chance she brought the gun along just to terrorise them, it was her husband’s which he had ironically bought for his own protection, but the sight of her husband with another woman was too much for her she went straight in and began an open fire, the first three missed their destination but as they say practice makes one perfect the next three produced the desired result.
She hadn’t moved a bit, still holding the gun out as if waiting for someone to come through the wall, she was trying to resist every thought that came in her mind,  afraid to know how she felt about it, hoping that this is all a dream and she is about to wake up too afraid to know what lies next but slowly reality did sink in, overwhelmed she fell to the ground but to her surprise she found herself laughing, she felt great and it terrified her but she couldn’t help it she felt like she was nineteen again having her first orgasm. She often had dreams of killing people but she neglected them as nightmares but now she knew what they really meant, the thrill she felt was beyond anything she had ever experienced no matter how much she tried tears never arrived, she kept searching but could not find a hint of remorse.   Self preservation kicked in and she began the clean up so that no evidence of her presence is found, in the meanwhile a new thought struck her that both horrified and excited her to the same extent, the thought of performing the next kill.

12 comments:

IdleMind said...

I was almost expecting a shock and got it at the last line. Wish she keeps herself alive ... to tell the next part of her life.

Or better still, let her show the world what it takes to kill a loveable life in seconds.

Your thoughts are really in a terrific shape!

Manjay said...

u knw after readin 3 times i got d story but nice....

Rishi said...

my eyes r wide open;.. even right now...

nice... i meant ur post and not my eyes being wide open

Oxymoron said...

@idle actually the thought of putting the twist came to me while i was writing...i stated with a completely different intention...what she does next would be interesting....thnx for the appreciation...

@manjay i m glad you finally got it... :)

@rishi thanx for visiting my blog...it's always nice to know that my writing does effect people....

rimz said...

ohh strange.. ur thoughtline is shockingly interesting .kinda liked it. wud hve loved a bit more illustration.
tc.

Vikram Kumar said...

Very Raw and emotional.
The flow of the plot is good and the usage of words is really nice.
My first time in this blog.. and it surely won't be the last.

Do check out my blog when you find time. http://findvikki420.blogspot.com/
Cheers.

NUKTAA said...

nicely put thoughts and terrific switching, fast paced and powerful story, amzaing twist overall a NINER on a rating scale of TEN

Oxymoron said...

@rimz thanks for visiting my blog....
i left the story short with very little illustration to bring out the shock....

@vikram thanks for the appreciation and welcome to my blog...
i will definitely visit your blog...

@NUKTAA i am glad you loved the story....
thanks for all the kind words

Yemiledu said...

Hey all your stories are really good. But I guess it would be nicer if they are a bit longer :)

So who is she gonna kill next??

Vittaldas Prabhu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Vittaldas Prabhu said...

I am blown away! And I feel that saying that too is sort of an understatement.

I could imagine every bit of this story, the action took life in my head as I moved on. Really vivid. I am simply amazed by the thoughts of the third person (the woman). You have very nicely brought that out and made it look easy (though, perhaps, I could never have conjured this up if it were me writing this story). The impulse, the fury, the frustration, the deed, the regret, the evil satisfaction, the pain - all of these have emerged really nicely.

Great work!

Cheers,
Vittal

Candida F said...

Hey excellently written!
the story has the best draw as it progresses, very engaging read!